Ok so the big day before the big day has arrived. I have decided to do half a days work to help get the time go by before we have to leave for Machester.I can say without a doubt that I am getting very nervous about what lies ahead. Nothing could have prepared me for the emotional turmoil I am going through. Leaving work today, I had to really fight my emotions as I said goodbye to my assistants. I had one hug and then just left with a general goodbye, fighting not to burst out crying like a baby.I have a massive knot in my stomach and I can’t help but wonder what the hell possessed me as I am packing my suitcase. I do not feel like Brave Heart at the moment more like Scardy Cat!
But his time tomorrow it should be done and over with. A thought that is slightly reassuring, less than 24 hours to go! Now that is enough to make me want to run. I know that this is the beginning of a new life for me and my partner. I keep on telling myself that the health benefits is making this worth while and also the fact that when I get married in a couple of years time I will not look like a meringue waddling down the isle. I wish we as humans could just push a button that stops you from experiencing emotion, so you become robot like. I do not want to be a wuss. But I am sure as they push me on the trolley tomorrow they’ll be transporting a whaling whale!
When I write again I will have had the op. I am looking forward to doing it!
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@ 2008-08-15 – 12:39:25
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